god these few days got really bad luck it's just...i can't explain it by any words because even me myself can't tell

she is a lovely girl no doubt about that but don't know how to be a girlfriend i hate her attuide towards me when everytime we have different opinions she is so cool as not caring me

i don't really feel any care to me from her but still i love her my loneliness , sadness comes maybe because i'm blaming myself for not being a good boyfriend ,but not the others

in fact i am thinking of that if i am treating too hard to the others i don't like the feeling in this few days it's hard and to me .. it's hard to solve the problem

don't know wheather she thinks this is a problem (that she don't care me so much) but to me ... it is problems which are created by myself come up i don't have mood to talk with her or even to do anything

love her but also dislike some part of her personility

still this is what called "love"

hope someone can help saving me from dropping in to this deep deep pool.. maybe i can swim...but i do not swim well shouting"need help"..although i can swim